For the past few years, we have tossed around the idea of moving south. Not south in MA, but south, as in North Carolina. A pretty terrifying thought for someone who never lived out of Massachusetts. Our initial plan was to move 30 minutes north into New Hampshire, and even that was scary…
A few years ago, we went on a road trip to see our potentially new area. What’s not to love? Weather that allows you to play outside all year (In recent years, Summer has started in July and ended in August where I live, not to mention the fact that most of June and July were rained out this year), year-round school (I’ve never heard of this, 2.5 months in school, then 3 weeks vacation, all year), a slower pace, less traffic, J working from home for a while, a neighborhood with lots of other kids who actually go outside to play and don’t need it scheduled a month in advance and really, just a more laid-back, more relaxed way of living.
Right now, J sits in traffic for at least 2 hours a day, he doesn’t get home to eat dinner with us on most nights, and, if lucky, gets to say a quick good night to the girls when he gets home. Up at the crack of dawn. Repeat 5 days per week. It stinks.
Why am I not on a plane right now? I know I can make friends (though I am heartbroken to think of leaving such good friends 
) Well…I live within 20 miles of almost every person I am blood-related to. No joke. We don’t move…We just reproduce and make more people that I am related to and then stay put…
And the seasons? I live in New England, the land of Fall Foliage and skiing. This Winter we played outside 2 times. 2. That’s all. A trip back to Boston for Christmas would get us outside more than that!
But, getting back would be the issue. To me, a 15 hour drive is no big deal. The girls might think differently. J definitely does…I hate to fly…will I be willing to get a on plane to come ‘home?’ Not so sure about that…
How do you weigh these options? On one had, living near family. On the other hand, my family’s quality of life…my happiness…J’s happiness…fresh air all year…family meals….cheaper cost of living…twice the house I have now for half the cost…Putting it on ‘paper’ makes it look like the decision should be clear, but it just isn’t.
Related posts:
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
I totally understand!!!!!!!! We may be making the “doing what’s right for our family” decision, too. It is certainly not easy.
We moved from Philly to Charlotte in 2006 so I totally understand. We came to all of the same conclusions you did. It was hard in the beginning, finding new favorites, no family to babysit. We were homesick the first year…until we went back to Philly. We have time to spend with each other, space when we need to get away from each other, dinner together and most of all peace of mind.
Why do you want to stay? Aside from family? As long as your priority is with the family you made, I’m sure you’ll be happy with whatever you decide.
P.S. yes I’m am biased. N.C. is home for us now.
Theresa Rose´s last blog ..Learning to Research
Family and friends are why we’d want to stay…not the weather, the commute, etc. Such a tough decision, especially as parents are getting older, grandparents, even more so…
That is hard deciding to move so far away from your family. I’m from MA & don’t miss the traffic & the drivers. We’re just in Southern NH, so we’re about 45 min from my parents & where we are from. I always wanted to live somewhere that’s warm year-round. I don’t think we ever will. I really like NH. It is much mellower up here & the people are nicer. I’m less stressed driving, less traffic. But we still have crappy snowy winters & rainy Summers. We do have a bigger yard & a bigger house. Maybe you could move to NH for a few years & see if you like it here, you’d still be close to your family. Then if you are ready to move to NC do that in a few years. I love the South too. I always wanted to move to VA.
dramaqueensmum´s last blog ..family reunion
Unfortunately, if we stayed here or moved to NH, my husband would be still commuting to Boston, so even with the bigger house, nicer area, we’d be in the same boat with family time. Sigh…
Im prayin for ya
natalee´s last blog ..My husband has Superpowers
I’ll make it easier for you…. don’t move!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Always difficult to make the first move away from family (even tough after multiple times in fact!). But monthly (or weekly!) visits from Uncle C and Auntie N (and a first cousin for M and A) might soften the home sickness while you adjust!
C and I have found that we have more friends/family visiting now than when we were actually living in Boston! The winter weather brings everyone down south to seek a reprieve. I know the decision is beyond difficult because it is more than just a list of pros and cons. That being said, the thought of BBQ-ing with you guys on weekends clouds our judgement!
In the end all you have is your family– the four of you and you have to do what is best for you and your family. Your extended family will always be here you said it yourself you just reproduce and stayput– if it doesn’t work out you can always move back! You will never know if you don’t try it!! Good luck these types of decisions are always difficult.
I’ll ditto Missy!!
Oooooh I’m SUCH a chicken. I’d be the same way. That said, Indiana is super cheap and the house across the street is for sale. Nice quiet addition. 2400 sq ft for 150K. Nice mommy neighbor friend right there for ya
You’ll still get your seasons too.
Lizz B´s last blog ..State of The Children Address – Summer ’09