Kids who won’t sleep and extremely annoying cats

We’ve been having some sleep trouble for the past week. Abs has been waking up several times a night, yelling for me, and refusing to go back to sleep. It sucks. We just spent almost 2 years dealing with M and her refusal to stay in her room at night. Throughout which, Abs peacefully slept, never even knowing all the drama that was going on. Of course, now that M’s trouble is fixed, we are back to square one, and it seems to be a bit worse.

Last night was the worst. Not only was I running on 7 hours sleep over the past 2 nights, but the girls are sick. As much as I’d like to shut the door and let her scream herself silly, there is a VERY small part of me that feels guilty because she has a cold.

As soon as she started crying, we both woke up, and Joe muttered (in our room of course), “Abs, shut the f*^& up.” To which I replied, “Hey, that’s not nice. She’s sick.” Then she started yelling for me. She never yells for Daddy.

“Abs, SHUT THE F*&^ UP!”

“I thought you said that wasn’t nice because she is sick?”

“When she starts yelling for you at all hours, you can say whatever the f*^$ you want. Let me be annoyed right now.”

So he left the room. The chaos also woke M up, so she wandered into our room. I got Abs, and brought her in our bed with her M and me. She has come to expect it, as it’s what I’ve been doing all week to try to get 10 precious extra minutes of rest. Does this help? No. Nor has it ever. Unlike M, who sleeps so soundly in our bed, Abs thinks our room is a playground. She comes in, laughs, gets tickled by Daddy, sings, wiggles, kicks me in the face. Last night, I had the misfortune of getting hit in the nose with the hard, plastic head of her favorite doll.

I only wish it knocked me out.

Now the 3 of us were in bed. I was groggy and barely awake, Abs was swinging her deadly weapon doll, looking for more than half the bed she was already claiming. M wouldn’t sleep. Abs definitely wouldn’t sleep. I have never been more jealous of Joe downstairs on our horribly uncomfortable couch in the freezing cold living room.

Every time one of the girls was almost asleep, our jackass cats decided to fight and make sure we all stayed awake to see it. 2 hours later, we were all still awake. Joe came upstairs to help with Abs. I don’t remember falling asleep, but I did. M did, too.

The next thing I remember is waking up to the sound of my cat puking in my room. I got up – again – and went to get something to clean it up. I know he had been under my bed, so I tried to locate the offending mess. Nowhere to be found. The bastard threw up inside my box spring, which he has graciously torn up to create a hiding spot. He knows he is one step away from being traded for a handful of magic beans and knows I can’t get to him in there.

Today, we’re all awake. All tired and cranky. Except Pumpkin, the asshole cat. He is walking around with a spring in his step and a look that says, “Just wait until you see what I have in store for you next.”

Weirdly enough, Abs has that same look on her face.

Related posts:

1. Kids who still won’t sleep.
2. More about sleep
3. A discussion of sleep and fairness, By LZ