As I sit here drinking my 3rd cup of tea…after a large coffee already this morning, I’m looking at Abs with evil eyes. She was supposed to be the good one. The one we could count on for sleeping well, and for sleeping through the chaos known as M.
We struggled for years – yes, years – with M sleeping. She slept so well in her crib. The minute we put her in a bed, the drama began. It finally subsided recently. She sleeps through the night, with only the occasional wake up. Even then, she just asks to be tucked back into bed. I’m ok with that. I can pretty much stay asleep while performing this simple act.
Abs. Oh, Abs. What is going on with you? For 2 years, you slept like an angel. Slept through most every noise, every midnight freak out that M threw at you. The shower, the toilet, the lights – nothing phased you. Maybe you woke up, looked at us, muttered ‘Stop making all that freakin’ noise!” but you still rolled right over and went back to sleep. What’s changed?
These days, she’s up in the middle of the night, ready to play. We, on the other hand, are not. At all. I’ve tried to refrain from bringing her in bed with us, but I can’t help it. I need my sleep, too. Not that I can sleep, but laying down is a distant second option. Joe does an Oscar-worthy job of pretending to sleep through her hysterics, but the second she is in our bed, he tosses and turns. And sighs and grumbles. Because this will help her fall asleep faster. Maybe it’s to prove a point that she shouldn’t be in our bed, but I’m too thick to get hints in the middle of the night.
Last night, I got her at 2:30, and she came to bed with me. As much as I would love an interrupted night of sleep, I enjoy the snuggling for about 10 minutes. She’s chubby. She’s warm. She is so happy to be in bed with us. We both dozed off. At 4am, I woke up with her sucking on my nose as if it were her delicious thumb. Funny, yet so, so gross.
Is it really so bad if she’s in bed with us? Sure, I don’t sleep well, but it’s better than standing up, swaying with her in her room. She is a tank. She gets heavy quickly. In bed, I am relaxing. I guess the most important question is whether I’m ready to deal with sleep issues for another 3 years, like with did with M. The answer is a resounding NO. Ask me tonight at 2:30, and I assure you the answer will be different.
Related posts:
{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
Ugh, there is nothing worse than musical beds. Even at the age of 9, my son is all over the place with where he sleeps. Then my husband is up a million times and the snoring!! Awful, awful!
Last night I got my first good night of sleep in two weeks. How? I slept on the couch downstairs, two levels below the bedrooms. No snoring, no musucal beds, no dog all over me. Ahhhhhhh.
Good luck to you…I hope you get a good night’s sleep soon!
Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com´s last blog ..Poor Amelia
At 8:45 last night, after my boy was suppoed to be sleeping for 45 minutes already, I hear “Mommy, I NEED you”. I go in to find him with no pants or diaper on and he had peed in his crib. After I finally got him to sleep at 9 he woke up at 5 am having peed through his diaper. How does one child create so much urine? It is impossible. I wish you luck in her sleeping!!!
Kameron´s last blog ..Jack-o-lantern Spectacular
I hear you! My 3 1/2 year old has been getting over a cold and I finally gave in and crawled into bed with her so I wouldn’t have to walk across the hall to tend to her every time she woke up or needed something. I’ve spent the last three nights with her feet and knees digging into my ribs or kidneys, or her butt in my face while she sleeps with the pillows against her back. For the life of me, I don’t know why she just can’t sleep next to me! Although at least she does sleep!
Debbie´s last blog ..I’ve Got Me a Girly Girl!
If, as you say, she’s ready to play, and not distressed when she’s up in the middle of the night, she needs to learn how to get herself back to sleep without you, or you’ll never sleep again (just a little bit of hyperbole there). Try just going in, checking that she’s okay, giving her a quick hug and telling her she has to just lie quietly in her bed until she’s ready to fall back to sleep. No holding and rocking her – quick hug and out. You may have one or two rough nights where you have to repeat this more than a few times, but then she’ll get the idea that there’s nothing to be gained by getting you up – no playtime in Mom & Dad’s bed, nothing other than minimal engagement.
Also, getting up in the night may be a temporary situation anyway – maybe in anticipation of a growth spurt, or a sign that she’s close to transitioning away from napping (if she still naps, that is). You just want to make sure that your actions don’t turn it into habit.
Good luck!!!!
That’s tough. Especially when she’s been such a good sleeper up until this point. I have to admit I cannot sleep with either child in our bed. I’m too selfish. I want all the covers / space for myself. And I can’t bear all the elbows and knees disturbing me. But you have to do whatever works for you right now. Hope it sorts itself out for you soon!
Lady Mama´s last blog ..The office that love forgot
I feel so blessed for never having had this problem. I totally understand how it would be easier to just have her sleep with you!
blueviolet´s last blog ..Light As a Feather, Stiff as a Board
Asher has taken to sleeping in our bed lately too. You could have mirrored this post with my boys. Except the nose sucking part. That was about the funniest thing I’ve ever heard! How adorable!
sara@ domestically challenged´s last blog ..A "friendly" email
My kids NEVER want to sleep in our bed. It’s more like party time! Sucks for me.
My youngest was up at the glorious hour of 4:30 today. Now I’m paranoid that she’s got the swine flu. When will these sleeping problems end!?
Try carrot juice, in addition to the two cups of coffee I drink, it really gives me a jolt of energy…
Amanda´s last blog ..Take Your Fritos And Shove Them
Ah, I feel your pain. My little Monkey boy is still in his crib, but wakes up ready to play at three am! Yoiks.
Jennifer @ It’s A Beauty Filled Life´s last blog ..HABL and The Beast That Is Facebook Online Poker
My son wouldn’t sleep during the day (naps were pretty much non-existent even as a baby) but slept like a champ @ night. My daughter on the other hand, slept w/ us the first night home from the hospital. It wasn’t planned. It was quite literally the only way she would settle down & sleep & it didn’t happen every night, either. And we did put her back to bed as soon as her little feet hit our door. Sometimes. But, we do/did have a king size bed & lots of times she ended up sleeping w/ us. My thought was that if Hubby disliked it so bad then He should maybe get up & help sometimes. So that’s my two cents worth. Not a lot of help, eh? You totally cracked me up w/ the sucking on the nose thing. Good luck waking up & the whole sleeping through the night thing.
Sues2u2´s last blog ..Not Aloha Friday
So funny I’m reading this this morning when MY good sleeper was up at 6 on the one day my bad sleeper had a sleepover at grandma’s. I was so looking forward to sleeping until 8! And he has no desire to stay sitting in my bed for any length of time. I only wish I had kids who ever wanted to sleep in bed with me. Look at it as a good thing. You need your sleep somehow and if it means having a few extra arms and legs in bed with you, so be it! It certainly won’t last forever and I’m sure you’ll one day miss it!
I will answer and run because I am not the popular opinion…
I loved my daughter sleeping with us and she did so until she was 5. Heavenly. Huge bed, plenty of room, lots of space for all, peace, comfort
)
When she is really sad, she will still come in and crawl on my side of the bed and I hold her (she’s 16). There is a wordless connection all night as you sleep with your child. I think love keeps bouncing off from one to the other, so when you wake up, the child is filled with confidence in your love and you have peace. Try it. What’s the worse that could happen? The worst is that you end up putting your child back in their bed. See. It is worth a shot.
Have a lovely day and slumberous night ♥
The Redhead Riter´s last blog ..Stamp Out Envy
We’ve had Gunnar end up in our bed a few nights/early mornings recently. The first time, he snuggled right in and stayed asleep for an hour longer than usual. The next time, he insisted on forming the middle part of an “H” across the bed.
I’m cautiously optimistic that the worst of our really bad sleeping streak is over, because I just cannot deal with the getting up at all hours. Settling for some kind of rest with little feet in my throat isn’t fun, but I’ll take it every once in a while over not sleeping at all.
Deb´s last blog ..Highlights from Aiming Low