A Cougar is a large cat
I interrupt my regularly scheduled programming to talk about a very important subject. One that can not be ignored any longer.
Of course, I am talking about the rampant use of the word cougar.
A cougar is a cat. One that is kept in a zoo and clearly labeled as such. How did it become a term for an older woman who likes younger men? There is no good reason to bug me, but it is my pet peeve of the day.
Yes, it’s descriptive. I know exactly what you mean when you use the term. Cougar bars? Cougar chat rooms? Come on, ladies. Don’ you realize that using this term is like pointing out some sort of flaw? Can’t you just be a sexy woman? Can’t you just be a woman who likes to hook up? Use of the term cougar implies that there is something wrong with being older. It suggests that only a special kind of older woman is sexy or desirable.
I’m not humorless. I don’t find it offensive, it doesn’t set me off in a tirade. Usually. Older women, older men, who cares? I have even been known to laugh about it. My brother dated a woman 3 years older and called her a cougar. Pretty funny. What wouldn’t have been so funny is if she was the one using the term as if she were some sort of predator, dressing like an 8th grader, looking for a young guy.
Have you seen the SNL skit with Cameron Diaz, called ‘Cougar Den?’ No? Here it is…
It makes me laugh that they have summed up my feelings on the term so perfectly. If you need to use a silly term to tell people that you are hot and sexy, you might want to try something else! It reminds me of people who keep telling you how honest they are. If you have to keep rubbing that in my face, I’m going to start doubting it.
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Posted by LZ on November 30, 2009
Filed under: Daily Life, Favorite Posts, Getting Old
Tags: photos
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November 30, 2009
HA!! Too true. I have this big issue with anyone who has to tell me how anything they are. If you have to tell me how smart, funny, sexy, honest, whatever you are then I am going to regard you much more critically than if you let me figure out this character trait for myself. (same goes for self degrading labels – “I am such a nerd/geek/book worm”. Really b/c the only time you act like one is when you want people to see you as one (b/c being different is what you are really going after)…anyway….I totally agree…sorry to go off but you really hit a nerve for me (apparently….future blog post maybe?)
Liz@LovingMom´s last blog ..Its Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas!!
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LZ replied:
November 30th, 2009
Well said!
I really don’t know what set me off, I know I read something about cougars yesterday and it is just driving me crazy. I was silly enough to watch the reality dating show recently about older woman and younger women vying for the ex-tennis pro. I couldn’t take it. The younger women acting catty about the ‘old ladies’ and the older women suggesting you have to be up in years to really know men. Just stop it, everyone!!!
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November 30, 2009
I never really thought about that before! It is super silly! Who coined it?
blueviolet´s last blog ..1, 2, 3…Back in Stalker Mode…..NOW!
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November 30, 2009
I agree. I think from now on I’ll just refer to myself as a MILF.
becca´s last blog ..Brain has left the building
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LZ replied:
December 1st, 2009
I’m cool with MILF.
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November 30, 2009
Thank you! “Cougar” has always bugged the hell out of me. Why shouldn’t she date a younger man?!
Meg at Demanding Joy´s last blog ..How to Please a Husband
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December 1, 2009
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by LZ, LZ. LZ said: Cougar? Probably not. – http://mymessyparadise.com/2009/11/a-cougar-is-a-large-cat/ [...]
December 1, 2009
Agreed! I find it irritating too. Funny how people find these strange labels for themselves.
Lady Mama´s last blog ..Lovely day for pulling staples out the floor.
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December 1, 2009
Twitter: ThetaMom
I remember that SNL skit. SO funny! I’m with the above comments…I’m going with MILF.
Theta Mom´s last blog ..Boo Doo Bee Doo Santa Baby, Forgot to Mention One Little Thing; A Christmas Meme!
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December 1, 2009
I’m SO with you on this one. It has bothered me since the first time I heard it. MILF is o.k. except I guess it would exclude any woman who wasn’t actually a mom! And then I guess they’d just be a WILF!
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December 6, 2009
This bugs me almost as much as the term “baby bump.” Both terms need to die. What woman wants to be referred to as a prowling cat, and what pregnant woman wants to be defined by her (choking here) bump? Glad I’m not the only one who feels this way.
Laura´s last blog ..Wisdom
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LZ replied:
December 7th, 2009
Baby bump is a good one!
Cougar has just been eating away at me more and more as there seem to be lifestyle changes to make oneself more cougar-like. It’s cool, try to be sexier, meet more men – good for you! But aspire to do those things for the sake of them…not to be seen as a cougar. It’s rather derogatory, in my opinion…
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